Secondhand Shame
You might be aware that my attempt to showcase this series was hobbled by the fact that Google region-blocked the entire series for no reason at all.
But it pleases me to announce that despite this minor roadblock, I've found a way to gain access to the entire series in English!
The second volume may be called "It's Ugly Out There", but in my opinion, what's really ugly is the quality of the English cover image I got from the official website.
After I started working on this page, I took another peek at the Google Play store. While they do have the entire series up again, including the two spinoff albums, none of them are in English. A welcome change, but it's too late. I don't trust Google anymore, for a number of reasons that go beyond their mishandling of foreign-language comics.
Here's the description.
They're young, beautiful...and merciless!
When they find out that their friend Karine, gentle yet slightly blessed by nature, is getting ready to go out with the handsome Dan, they decide to react and demonstrate their active imaginations to sabotage this developing romance. Not because they can't stand competition (Karine is too ugly to overshadow them, you see!) but to save their beautiful friendship.
Now, where we last left off, Karine had finally gotten somewhere with Dan. It's not a major step forward, especially since she's still at her so-called friends' mercy, but it's something.
I won't lie to you, this volume is more of the same in terms of humor. Pretty much the whole volume is dedicated to the girls trying to sabotage their relationship. Because being Karine is suffering; such is the natural order of things.
Oh, and Murphy's back, hooray. Don't tell me you've forgotten about him?
Now that Karine is going out with Dan, he's the one character with practically zero chance!
But also, John John's back! Oh right, oh right...remember that last volume, where Karine had a little run-in with him after his bike got wrecked? Here's how it went:
Karine: Take off that helmet, you smell like shit.
John John: It's called aura, Karine. But fine.
So Murphy goes to him and asks for his helmet so that he can score. Obviously it doesn't work. Because he's Murphy.
Yep, shit's dire. So dire, that he decides to run off into the boy's bathroom to end it all.
And when Karine runs in after him, someone looking on says, and I quote, "If you looked like her, you'd be questioning your gender identity too" Holy sh...eh...I may have heard worse jabs when I was in middle school, but still, this is a bit much for a kids' comic. But it's been more than two years since the first time I've showcased a European comic here; I should have accepted a long time ago that they're just like that.
But enough hand-wringing, let's go back to those other two. What's going on with them? The usual, that is to say, the sabotage and putdowns that I've mentioned before.
Even though they don't seem to mind that much when they think Karine might be about to get some.
Oh, and don't think that she remains the only victim of their cruelty. They've got plenty of venom to spare for random passersby.
But hey, sometimes getting guys to do your bidding simply won't cut it, so why not get a dog instead? "Accessory." That's its name. That's the name she gives it. Even better is her plan for getting it home: tie it to the back of John John's bike, like one of those cans tied to the backs of newly married couples' cars. Unfortunately for her, dogs aren't cans, and dont take to being knocked against asphalt at high speeds very well.
Gruesome animal murder, fun for the whole family! Okay not quite the whole family, the English version of this volume is rated 15 and up, while the first volume was rated 12 and up. Though, weirdly, Cinebook's website used to place it in the "ages 7 to 77" category. Obviously there was some sort of miscommunication going on over at the company to give us this blunder.
But that doesn't mean we've seen the last of him! Just a few pages later, we see him try to pull a Jacob Marley on her! But too bad that this kind of trick only works on people with consciences.
Since we're still dealing with Jenny, let's meet her sister, Jenna. Yeah, real original on their mom's part. I say this because there's no real evidence that there's a dad at home.
...Now just from looking at her, how old would you say she is, 11? 12? Yet you can clearly see that her shirt has "Porn Star" written on it. What is it with these comics and their putting minors in suspect situations? And the rest of her family is no better: look up "trailer trash" in the dictionary, and you might find their picture! Now, this does explain a couple of things, but still leaves me to wonder how on earth would she manage to afford the plastic surgery she wants?
And on the topic of siblings, here's Rebecca. The very first thing we see from her is her in her underwear, and the second is her calling her sister's outfit a tacky, embarrassing mess. And the third is her calling her fat! And so is the fourth!
Side note, she reminds me a bit of Alberto's sister from The Demon Rush. Yes, a game I didn't expect to actually finish before going back to this comic, and one I expected to be reminded of even less. And now that I think about it, Vicky is a bit like Alberto in that both of them are self-centered jerks who butt heads with their friends.
Back on the sabotage front...yeah, things aren't going over too well. But what do you expect when you're too busy arguing with each other to get anything done? It would be almost endearing, if both of them weren't so horrible. And if they weren't also fighting each other over John John.
And if they weren't actively sabotaging each other in the process. At least Murphy's still a pretty useful lapdog. Easy when you've literally nothing else going for you. All this is managing to do is make me feel embarassment for everyone involved. Yes, even Karine, because she clearly has yet to grow a spine!
So with everything turning out poorly for both of them, what are they to do? That's easy, trick Murphy into suicide-baiting Karine and...oh, against all odds, he's found himself a girlfriend. Huh, that's some turnaround. So between all the major characters in this comic, the only one who isn't presently spoken for is Vicky. Huh.
But clearly, he's not so faithful to her that he wouldn't jump at the chance to upgrade.
But who will deal with Dan? Well it just so happens that we have an interested party. All they have to do is set them next to each other and hope that sparks fly...or for her to immediately tell him that Murphy got a perfect score, and has no reason to actually kill himself. Wow. I knew that your little plan would be foiled at some point, but I didn't expect it to happen in all of two pages! But what do you expect when you're operating at an average of around 50% brainpower?
And now you gotta kiss Murphy, cause hey, someone's gotta get their happy ending!
But you know the saying "I'd rather jump off a cliff than be with you?" ...Okay, maybe not those exact words, but still, that's basically what Vicky does.
These kids are just so, so dramatic.
And that's the volume. So things are pretty much the same as they were in volume 1, except Vicky's in the hospital, Jenny's now dating John John, and Murphy's ended up with...someone. The end!